Blog Nazis and New Year's Resolutions

Before I begin, I would like to send a warm karmic hello out into the universe on this fine January day, and wish you all a very happy New Year. I would also like to dedicate this post to my sister, the blog nazi, who threatened me at the point of a knitting needle...love you, Chris!

Well, as I'm sure we are all aware, New Year's has come once more and the siren call of a pristine and unsullied future beckons... a dream which lasts for about five minutes before Reality drags you back to the daily grind, kicking and screaming. In all honesty folks, I've never felt New Year's to be a particularly joyful holiday. For me, it has always had more of the tone of a starting pistol at race--or an unwelcome alarm clock intruding on a pleasant dream--they both seem to shout at you, saying,"Go now! Start changing! Are you a better person yet? Well, are you?!" It makes me tired.

Therefore, I have figuratively stuck it to Father Time by pressing my metaphorical snooze button. I have resolved to take my own sweet time in becoming a better human being. Not to say I won't try, but rather that I refuse to be bullied into it all at once. And anyway, in what universe is it practical to change so suddenly?

For example, this morning I was standing in line at the bank inside Dick's Market place, waiting to cash my check. Ahead of me were two suburbanistas (my new word for the particular breed of "super Mom" that inhabits the greater area of the Wasatch Front--I think it's quite catchy, don't you?) who were busy chatting away the tedium of the wait. As I listened quietly behind them their talk turned to their New Year's goals.

One woman was complaining that ever since she decided to take control of her family's finances her life seemed to be falling apart at the seams. Apparently this lady--who, to judge by her conversation, has never used a computer except for checking email and shopping online--went out first thing after the holidays and bought some fancy new software that claimed it could organize your entire financial portfolio in a matter of minutes with minimal effort on your part. However, even after overcoming her "technical difficulties," it apparently lacks the magical power to make you physically stop spending. After two days of rigid documentation, this woman was in such despair over knowing, in precise detail, how dismal her shopping habits were, that she revoked her resolution because she "just couldn't handle it." Isn't that just sad?

So I repeat, I refuse to make life altering decisions at the drop of a hat--or ball, as it were--simply because it is tradition. I have made no new budgets, I do not plan on trying an exercise regimen I know to be out of my league simply because I want to look nice for swimsuit season, and I have no intention of giving up chocolate or white cheddar cheetos in favor of steamed broccoli and "light" yogurt.

I have decided to look for at least one nice thing in everybody who bugs me and comment on it. I have decided to be more prudent in managing my study time. And I have decided to smile at my reflection first thing every morning--no matter how pasty white and puffy-eyed it is. And I believe that I as tackle three small goals, one day at a time, I might learn to take on more. If I do, I let you know. Heck, I might even blog regularly... :)

Happy New Year's everybody.